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T'was the rice before Christmas
Twas the night before Christmas
and I was caught at the light,
With this sweet Camaro,
and no cops in sight,
I will try, I will try,
I will try with this small motor,
To beat this Camaro,
I know he don't have a blower,
As the light goes green
and I pull like no joke,
The Camaro erupts in clouds of tire smoke,
Now Smasher,now Rev-ver,now Stroker, now Blitzin,
These are the names of my four VTEC pistons,
Racing ahead I'm the Star of the action,
But I know Im in trouble when that beast gets traction,
Grabbing second, I hear the RPMs sing,
Can�t see the car
Cause of my shopping kart wing,
I now hear the roar,
Of that big monster gaining,
All I can do is keep that four-banger straining,
In a second, the shockwave hits with a blast,
And my APC stickers go flying now, a thing of the past,
Don't bother with third,
cause now it's too late,
Just try to act cool,
like u can relate
I saw him slow down
As he let off the gas
So I stomped on it again
to do my hazard light pass!
I will exclaim to my friends that this Friday night
"I smoked a Camaro from light to light!".
At a recent computer expo (COMDEX), Bill Gates reportedly compared the
computer industry with the auto industry and stated :
"if GM had kept up with the technology like the computer industry has,
we would all be driving $25.00 cars that got 1,000 miles to the gallon."
In response to Bill's comments, General Motors issued a press release stating:
If GM had developed technology like Microsoft; we would all be driving
cars with the following characteristics:
1. For no reason whatsoever, your car would crash twice a day.
2. Every time they repainted the lines in the road, you would have to buy a new car.
3. Occasionally your car would die on the freeway for no reason. You would have
to pull over to the side of the road, close all of the windows, shut off the car, restart it,
and reopen the windows before you could continue.
For some reason you would simply accept this.
4. Occasionally, executing a maneuver such as a left turn would cause your car to
shut down and refuse to restart, in which case you would have to reinstall the engine.
5. Only one person at a time could use the car unless you bought "CarNT", but then
you would have to buy more seats.
6. Macintosh would make a car that was powered by the sun, was reliable, five times
as fast and twice as easy to drive-but would only run on five percent of the roads.
7. The oil, water temperature, and alternator warning lights would all be replaced
by a single "General Protection Fault" warning light.
8. New seats would force everyone to have the same sized butt.
9. The airbag system would ask, "are you sure?" before deploying.
10. Occasionally, for no reason whatsoever, your car would lock you out and refuse to let
you in until you simultaneously lifted the door handle, turned the key and grabbed hold
of the radio antenna.
11. GM would require all car buyers to also purchase a deluxe set of Rand McNally
road maps (now a GM subsidiary), even though they neither need nor want them.
Attempting to delete this option would immediately cause the car's performance to
diminish by 50% or more. Moreover, GM would become a target for investigation
by the Justice Dept.
12. Every time GM introduced a new car, car buyers would have to learn to drive all
over again because none of the controls would operate in the same manner as the old car.
13. You'd have to press the "Start" button to turn the engine off.
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> CAMARO Elite Page!
2) Night Pictures!
3) Mod List!
4> Funny Page! (You're Here!)
5) Various Car Show Pictures!
6) Old Pictures!
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